Stop Me If You've Heard This One...

Check this stupid-huge MP3 archive: http://www.ubu.com/mp3/

Hittin' the Road

So...I finally got my itinerary! Gee, that didn't take long at all. So far, it looks like there's a lot of breathing room n' whatnot. I don't see it there, but I figure there'll be a stopover in Madison, which would be cool. Actually, anywhere there's a Hardee's nearby would be cool. I might be writing a cheque my ass can't cash, but I'm thinking of keeping a visual diary while I'm out there, a la Craig Thompson's Carnet de Voyage (which I might finish reading on the way, if I don't beforehand). It could be fun, plus it's a good way to get through some long-ass busrides, and possibly shitty film choices.

R.I.P Hideaki Sekiguchi

...better known as Billy or Bass Wolf of the legendary Guitar Wolf.
I was introduced to the mighty Guitar Wolf back in 1996, when I was working at Musiplex. I can't remember if I read about them, or if a co-worker got me hip to them, but I remember what I felt when I first heard them. I was like, "this is what real rock n' roll is all about". The album was Missile Me, and it sounded like it was recorded in a parking garage. From the get-go, they had a fan in me for life. Rest in peace, Billy.

Pitchfork Media's Coverage

Illustration Friday: "Crowded"

Squeeze, Without the Play, 2005 • Col-Erase, Pentel Brush Pen and Staedtler Pigment Liner

I decided not to ruin this by coloring it. If you wanna take a crack at it, though, I've got a bigger version here. Word.
I think any bus rider worth his/her salt has been in a situation like this at one time or another. You don't have to have a ton of people to be crowded, f'real.
Or how about that one guy/girl that corners you at a party and invades your space? There ya go.

I'm itchin' to get out of this here town. In less than a week, I'll be Stateside, eating my way through 3 cities. If I'm lucky, I'll run into David Witt in Minneapolis at the Oxes show. That has nothing to do with eating, but it's cool nonetheless.

Oh yeah, if you do color the bigger version, let me know...I wanna see!

I'm Sorry...

...but Michael Jackson equating his legal struggle to the persecution of Nelson Mandela and Jack Johnson is disgusting and ridiculous. How fuckin' jaded is this dude?

I Do Believe My Hairline Is Slowly Receding

I'm gonna start ritualistically shaving my head. Like Montel Williams and Michael Jordan. Word.

Random Thoughts: March 26th, 2005

• I'm feeling reflective today. It looks like winter's finally giving up the ghost, but I'm hedging my bets. The thing about Winnipeg is if you don't dig the weather at the moment, you just have to wait a second...it'll change.
• Coke® with Lime? I like it!
• I just started messing with Subway's™ Chicken Bacon Ranch Sub. Mad tasty, especially toasted. Don't get me wrong, they can't touch Quizno's, but they've got something that'll keep me coming back.
• Speaking of Subway™, there's a fifth location opening up in the Downtown Winnipeg area. I really don't know what to think of that.
• I'm currently considering my post-school options. Right now, all signs point toward "gettin' my hustle on". I have a vague notion of what that entails. If it gets me a comfortable amount of Kozik/Biskup/Baseman-type fame, that's cool...I'm all for it.
• I need a new perspective...I need to get out of this city for a little while. I can't wait for my Chicago trip. I'll post my itinerary as soon as I get it.
  

I No Longer Watch Channel Zero: Al on Television

This is straight from the heart, baby.

My man Jeope can truly attest to how addicted I was to television back in the day. In '85, I was so attuned to what was on the tube, I had my viewing schedule for the fall all written out. I was 10. If I wasn't watching wrestling (another deep and early obsession), it was cartoons, sitcoms, or videos on Much.
I think I'd have to say that the internet has taken the place of TV in my life, because it feeds my insatiable hunger for pop culture minutiae. The thing is, it has allso made me quite aware of how much drivel there is on the "idiot box". I could give a fuck about The O.C. as a show (Ms. Barton needs a steak dinner, yo.). What I am interested in is the indie rock name-dropping that seems integral to it. As fine as Tyra Banks is, I'd rather find an inch long manicured finger in my Wendy's chili than watch America's Top Model. I think Zach Braff is a smart mofo, but I can't watch Scrubs...even with fine-ass Sarah Chalke. Does this mean I'm gonna unplug the bitch? Let's not get hasty.

Sitcoms
Since Seinfeld, I can't really bring myself to watch a sitcom on the regular. It's not like Seinfeld was the alpha and omega, I'm just spoiled for other ones since it was so good. I started watching Less Than Perfect due to a certain redhead, but even she wasn't enough to keep me interested. Anytime I'm home early enough to see The World According to Jim on the box (sometimes Mom will watch any old thing), I see just how predictable and intelligence insulting a sitcom can be. With that said, I have a hard time committing myself to non-traditional sitcoms like Curb Your Enthusiasm and Arrested Development, too. I guess I'm skeptical of critical darlings. In the 80's, I was glued to Amen, The Golden Girls, 227, Cosby Show...hell, pretty much anything that made NBC king back then. I've seen every episode of Night Court.
Don't laugh.

Showcase
There was a time when I could count on this cable mainstay for cutting edge and gritty cinema, complete with commentary from Canadian film pundits before and after each flick. Then they decided to change things up. The first time Reindeer Games was a feature presentation on Showcase, I knew it was over. I mean, this was a network that went from showing European films with full contact blowjobs to showing CSI every week night! It's not like I need that type of thing on the regular, that's what porn is for. It displayed to me a change of focus. A disturbing one...a commercially viable change. At least Kink is around for one more season.

"Reality" Shows
Don't get me fuckin' started. The name of the very genre is a misnomer. Real people, yes...doing real things? Not on your life. That's not something you can put a price tag on or a product plaement in. No, you gotta have challenges. Survivor can go to Hell. In fact, that's where the next one should be. Bitches.

I've got more, but I'm heading to a showing of the 2004 Cannes commercials. Ain't it a bitch when the ads are more entertaining than the shows?

To be continued...

Illustration Friday: "Bloom"

In Bloom (Sorta), 2005 • Graphite, watercolor pencil, Photoshop®

I can't say I'm totally proud of this, but I had fun, and that's all I care about right now. Yes, it's based on Cobain, but it's not him. He played left-handed.

R.I.P. Mixmaster Spade

Before Noz and O-Dub uploaded tracks by Spade, I had only heard him on one joint: King Tee's "Just Clownin'". He had this cool sing-songy verse that I still remember.
Read here and here about this L.A. pioneer.

CSS Hatred

Right now, there are 8 of us trying to individualy re-design the CSS Zen Garden website for tomorrow. Not fun.

Non-Existant Bake Sale

I'm glad this isn't happening. I'm way too busy to bake anything.

Smash the State!!!

Johnny Thief teaches the kids how to break the law. I'm taking notes!
http://www.gigposters.com/phpBB/viewtopic.php?topic=32584

Illustration Friday: "Fragile"

Okay, so I lied...



Well Wouldya Look at That, 2005 • Blue Col-Erase, Graphite, and Pentel Brush Pen

There's no highfalutin' concept behind it, really. It was in my head and I needed to do something fun. I hope y'all dig it!
Back to work...

EDIT: It seems that they've changed the Illustration Friday deadline. That kinda sucks. Whatever.

Lucky Austin Bastards/No Illustration Friday For Me This Week

Right now, I'm here, but I'd rather be there. Someday, yo.

I wanna do Illustration Friday this week (the topic is "fragile"), but I'm swamped. Maybe next week.



That is all.

Illustration Friday: "Ancient"

ImageShack's been kinda slow today, so be patient pleeze:



Ancient Diptych: Whut?/Get the F**k Off My Lawn!, 2005 •? Pentel Brush Pen on Paper

This was fun to do! I just kinda, y'know...went for it. No pencil at all. Yes, it's a self-caricature.
I wanna take the time to pimp a couple of sites:

• Newstoday: I dig this site muchly. Have some cool conversation, or find a really dope link.
• Drawn.ca: I dub thee the 2nd best site in the world, next to gigposters.com.

I'm gonna go eat some bananas. Peace.

Type Assignment

This thing has been buggin' me for a bit, but it's done.

The cover.

History.

Legibility.

Letterforms As Images.

Interpretive Typography.

Digital Improvisation.


Props to ImageShack!

Frustrated

I dig dry erase markers. This is probably the most accurate self-caricature I've done.

Sideways Addendum

I just checked out the book version of Sideways, and noticed that the scenes with Cammi are handled in a far more mean-spirited fashion (the story is told from Miles' point-of-view). In the book she's referred to as "porcine" at worst and "Zaftig" (German for plump, I do believe) at backhanded best. Her husband is appropriately called Cuckold by Miles.

I like the film better.

Balak's "How To Draw Boobs"

I just had to post this, because nobody draws 'em like Balak. Really.
http://www.u-blog.net/balak/img/howto-001.gif
Don't say I ain't never done nothin' for ya.
Visit Balak here and here.

So I saw Sideways last night...

...and I loved it. Thomas Haden Church and Paul Giamatti were perfect. In fact, I couldn't find anything wrong with this film at all.
Y'know, I was gonna go on and on about how Sandra Oh continues to make me feel proud to be a Canuck, how disgustingly gorgeous Virginia Madsen is, and how the cinematographer handled Miles' (Giamatti) drunk moments, but there were two moments that really stuck out in my mind, and both of them have to do with actress Missy Doty.

There's something about this lady. Okay, I know what it is: she's radiant. Big, beautiful, and radiant. When she first appeared on screen as Cammi the waitress, I was charmed by her warm smile. Sure, she looked a little greasy, but she was a hard-workin' waitress (great makeup job). Jack (Church), the notorious horndog of the film, gets a spiritual high-five from me for hookin' up with her.

Seeing her later, having nasty make-up with her tow truck-driving husband (M.C. Gainey) thrilled me to no end, not only because it was kinda sexy, but because right there in front of me was a full-figured woman (NEKKID!) getting it on with her man and it wasn't played off for laughs. Sure, the situation itself was funny (you gotta see the film to understand), but it was also refreshing.

Checking out her IMDb profile, I realized I had seen her in an episode of Law and Order: Criminal Intent. I thought she was pretty captivating then, too. I'm tellin' you right now...I'm keeping a close eye on her.

Related links: Talking 'Sideways': A Conversation With Missy Doty • Missy Doty's IMDb profile • Official Sideways Site


EDIT: My girlfriend dislikes that scene. Where I saw a deceivingly kinky, pudgy minx that defiantly gets her freak on with men other than her husband, and revels in her hubby's jealous dirty talk (a bit of a turn on for me, admittedly), she saw a fat girl in a negative light. She didn't come off as beautiful to her. I understand where she's coming from (I still dig the scene, though). My hope is that with this role, Missy will get truly sexy roles to play. She deserves it.

Illustration Friday: "Jazz"

Yo, this one's a two-fer:



Traps, 2005 • graphite, pigment liner, and Photoshop®



Wheatland Couple, 2005 • graphite, orange fine point Sharpie®, and Photoshop®

It's the same old story: when I should be doing something more important, I'm doing something else. This was a lot more fun, of course. The first one is dedicated to one of my favorite things in jazz: the drum solo. It's also dedicated to Art Blakey, my favorite jazz drummer next to Gene Krupa and Buddy Rich. I started digging Art's drumming after picking up Thelonius Monk's Genius of Modern Music Vol. 1. He was thunder personified on that thing.
Originally, I was going to create something with Monk, Art, and Charlie Parker as a group, but lately, I've found that likenesses are not my strong point, so I based my illustration on how Art's playing made me feel. The drummer at the bottom left was done without reference, and the top one was drawn after a Gretsch promo photo of Art. I kinda like the first one better, but I think they can both hang. :)

The second illo is inspired by "Wheatland", a composition by my favorite jazz pianist (and fellow Canuck) Oscar Peterson. Everytime I listen to it, I can't help but picture tourists hopping off their bus to examine the majesty of a wheatfield, so that's what I drew. I certainly hope you get to listen to this tune someday. For me, it reminds me of all the beauty that's around us. From the little things to the gargantuan.
The album it's on, Canadiana Suite, is terrific from the very start, and it's also an audio travel guide; each composition represents a region of Canada.

Now I gotta get some work done.

Random Thoughts: March 1st, 2005

• I'm sick. Doin' much hackin' and snortin'.
• Sean Penn. Lighten up, willya? Did you have a senseofhumorectomy lately? Geez, dude.
• Sanitized. I'm enjoying much popularity with this here weblog since I toned down the language, stopped posting porn, and joined up with Illustration Friday. I may need an outlet for my nastier side somewhere down the line, though. We'll see.
• Debbie Gibson. Someone posted her Playboy photos on the web. As cute as she still is, I think her naughty bits were better left to my imagination. Best part of the whole thing is that now I don't have to drop one dime on the mag.
• Christy Hemme. The general indifference to the unveiling of her Playboy cover yesterday confirmed just how blasé most WWE fans are about her. Tough luck, girl.
• Marital Congrats... to Scott Keith.
  
• I'm going home.