Too Much On My Mind Like L.O.N.S.

The shit that's goin' down in Baltimore, man.
I wish I was a little more outspoken about things but in the end, I just don't want to argue with people. I don't have the time or energy. Folks that are fucking shit up out of anger in that city?*
I ain't mad at 'em. Would I do it myself? Nope. But I understand the frustration. We're looking at 400+-year slow-motion genocide against bIack people in the U.S., like it or not. If I mention this on Facebook, I just know that I'll get a lot of static from people I call friends that are unable to walk a mile in black folks' shoes. I guess that makes me a coward or something. So be it.

I like to think that I can "stay woke" while surrounding myself with beauty for the sake of my peace of mind. If you need me, I'll be at Pinterest or something.

*As usual, there are multiple angles involved in what's going on. CNN/Fox/CBS/NBC/ABC will sing you a one-note song, but there are people right there in the middle of things taking to Twitter and Tumblr to give you the uncut dope. Stories about how people are truly being affected, not some unified blanket statement. Stories that are positive about the situation that won't be covered by the aforementioned group, because the shit ain't sexy, and America needs its boogeymen/women.

Grabbin' the Bull By the Horns

"Internet Code of Conduct" is a bit of a misnomer. What I've actually drawn up for myself is a plan to streamline my online activities, particularly where social media is concerned.

Why? Because I'm tired, that's why.

On Tumblr, I'm bombarded day after day with posts related to racism, people denying racism exists, and other incidents of injustice and assholery. (Including homophobia, transphobia, fat hate, etc.) Also on Tumblr, I'm overwhelmed by illustration eye candy on the daily by people that actually use their time wisely and create stuff. My brain, eyes, and heart need a fucking break from both of these things because I'm going nowhere fast. With the former, I wonder what's the point of doing anything when the world is clearly so shitty and out to get me. As far as the latter is concerned, I can't get any better at creating things by just observing. It helps, but you need to put what you've learned into action by doing.

So, tonight I sat down and wrote out a plan to streamline my online activities; a personal set of rules. The plan is to keep it up for at least a month and see if it's effective. I'll adjust things where I need to. Basically, I'm attempting to take control of my habits and be a more productive me.

This is long overdue.

Green-Eyed Monster

My St. Patrick's Day tweet.

Wrestling with emotions, man. If you look up the definitions of jealousy and envy, I've got both going on. I need to go to Japan again. SXSW has long been a dream of mine to attend, especially for Flatstock.
All I know is, it's going to take work. Work to raise the money, or doing work that'll take me there on someone else's dime.

I can do it. I just have to tell myself that, and keep grindin'.

Birthday #40

 

It was a day like any other, except it was my birthday, and I reached the beginning of my fourth decade on this glorious ball of dirt. I dreaded this birthday like I dreaded my 25th, my 30th, my 35th, and my 39th. However, there was a certain amount of resignation from the whole deal.

I've been shown over the past year how fleeting life can be, so I've kinda thrown my hands up. No, I'm not giving up on life, I've just given up on buggin' out over the inevitable.

Does that mean I'm happier about the passage of time? Getthefuckouttahere. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to be alive, more so than I have been in the past three years. But, if you think I greeted this day with open fuckin' arms, you're dead wrong. No, I wasn't a knuckle-dragging sad sack. Just quiet, y'know? Reserved. I just let it happen to me. And it was fine.

I talked to my man Chris Pointon last Friday (we were doing our Draw Mob thing) about the turning 40 thing, and he talked about how he got through it by not looking at his life as a list of accomplishments, but a series of experiences. That worked for me. I've done some cool shit and seen some cool shit.

I hope there's more cool shit to come. God-willin', I'll be around to see it.

2015 Resolutions

1. Health. The usual stuff, really. Gotta get back on that horse. My wife and I started doing DDP Yoga last year, then we both got sidetracked by various ailments and depression. Time to eat right, and live right, because none of us are promised tomorrow.
   
2. Drawing and Writing. More drawing. Every day, if possible. In fact, my Inktober endeavours have shown me that it is possible. Also, I'd like to do more custom letter stuff. I need to push my skills in that department. Maybe a calligraphy class is in order? Skillshare?
   As far as writing goes...I really don't know. I use Tumblr for written expression now, way more than Blogger. I'm not sure what to make of that. Often I'm adding my two cents to something, or making sure folks know where a certain thing comes from, and who made it.
   Is that truly expression, though? What am I bringing into the world? Gotta think about this a little more. Tumbleweeds tend to loom large at this here blog.
   
3. The Business of Art. A full-time illustration career is still a bit of a dream, and I think it remains so because I haven't set goals to make it a reality. Save cash to leave day job, make promo items, contact art directors = GOALS. Now I just have to put those goals in order and write down the finer details. I may be over my fear of selling things, so that's something I can take a shot at doing.
   
4. The Mint. Still haven't been there. This must be rectified.
   
5. Debt. Still swimming in it. Maybe some inroads will be made in making it manageable.
   
6. Other Cameras. My PowerShot cameras are pretty much dead. I want to use my Canon Rebel again, but I think I'm having battery issues. Guess I gotta take my shit over to Don's!
   
7. Clothes. More pants, more socks, more underwear. Maybe some sleep gear? Definitely more t-shirts. In fact, New Japan stuff is a must.
   
8. Tidiness. My workspace looked like this last year, and to some degree, it looks like that again. When you think about it, every portion of the house could use a bit of love. Let's spruce this joint up!

This year is looking a lot like last year!